How I started living my life…
There was a time when I lived my life the way I lived it…
When I searched for myself among other people’s lives…
When I found myself and fiercely defended my life…
When I justified my life…
When I let myself go…
Now I live for myself and it still scares a lot of people. There is an opinion that this kind of life is a consequence of selfishness, indifference and other horrible vices. Well, in general, the situation is quite desolate, as you understand).
Of course, now I know that we all strive to live our own life, not someone else’s. Someone realizes this aspiration consciously, and someone deafly inwardly pines for the lost, but the pulse of life is for all, unequivocally.
However, Not everyone is willing to look the challenge in the face and admit their positions. Not everyone is ready to discern and see the constructed concepts of obligation, beneath which beats the fire of true desire. But this time of intense change initiates this process actively, in almost every person I meet.
There was a time when I decided to stop turning my life into a dumping ground for information garbage, radioactive gossip, unfiltered communication, and unjustified exploits.There was a time when I stopped putting myself at the end of the line, waiting for a lucky break, grabbing whatever I could get my hands on in between.
It was a very valuable time for me, and I still lean on it as a great platform, treaded out by my own experiences.
I stopped living by demand and common perceptions and chose to live by and for love the way my nature wanted me to.
And despite the fact that many people still justify the concept of intense physical, emotional, mental and mental exertion for the sake of a well-deserved opportunity to relax and finally let myself live, I meanwhile continue to choose freedom.
I’ve stopped feeling the dull guilt of wanting to be happy and do what I want. I stopped justifying my preferences and adjusting to the expectations of those closest to me.
It’s much more natural and rewarding to live my life and breathe fully, rather than walk around with a tight oxygen mask on my head because that’s what everyone else is doing. That’s how I feel now when I look back.
Over time, I have learned to understand where I am being asked for help and where I am being manipulated. Where they offer me advice and support, and where they pry into my own business. Where my inner space responded to the situation, and where it was time for a steely “no.”
The time of change irreversibly runs its course and my life continues to blossom, freed from under the rubble of self-pity and fear of the
future. The time of change forever revives the lost beauty of presence, inspiration in the present, and gratitude for all that has happened and is about to happen.
I love my life and continue to follow my heart.
Maria Shakti
