It has long been no secret that our harmonious interaction with reality is built on acceptance of life. However, knowing is one thing, but applying this principle in life or mastering this art is not for everyone. Today we will look at five stages of accepting the inevitable.
Sometimes life throws us such unexpected tasks, to which we can be totally unprepared: the loss of a loved one, illness, natural disasters, war, the end of a long love affair. And with all our will, we will never be able to control these unpredictable manifestations of reality.
They happen spontaneously and uninvited, sweeping through our psychological and mental landscapes in an earthquake, leaving behind deep marks and trauma. And, then, there comes a stage when we have to to rebuild ourselves, to put the pieces back together again. This process involves Five steps through which we return to wholeness.
1. denial
Denial is the very first reaction, the inability to believe what is happening or has already happened and the inability to accept the inevitable. It can’t happen. Not with me. Not now. No! And the more we deny reality, the more painful our experience will be later. In the meantime, we are in the process of denial, trying to convince ourselves that none of this is true and that there must be some global malfunction in the system and this error must be corrected immediately.
2. Anger .
Then comes the anger stage. This stage comes when we become aware of what is going on, and along with awareness we are joined by emotion. Anger is the same denial of reality, only it is fed by a bright emotional coloring. From the stage of passive denial, we move into the stage of active denial. We begin to accuse people, situations, and life; we throw tantrums, prove ourselves right, get angry, cry, and get angry again.
3. bargaining
After a good dose of anger, we calm down and, after weighing the situation, take subtle steps to make things right and get back on track. We suddenly begin to actively believe in God and negotiate with him desperately: “Please, God, help me. I’m going to be a very good boy, girl now. I will be the most wonderful, and studious, and obedient, and considerate. However, the situation continues to unfold, and when we realize this, we’re rolling into the next stage.
4. Depression
After our bargain with God has failed and we have lost our bargain, we become deeply disappointed, desperate, and, as a consequence, depressed. Here we plunge back into our saddest emotions, but without the denial of reality. This stage is very important and necessary, because it is at this stage that we allow ourselves to genuinely live the loss, whatever it may be. We are sad, and along with the release of the sadness, the healing process begins.
5. Total acceptance and humility
Time passes, life goes on, night follows day, and after winter still blossoms into spring and we begin to adjust to the situation, we find peace in these conditions and there comes a time of gratitude, acceptance, love, understanding, deep healing and abundance. And perhaps a sense of gratitude is one of the most important indicators of your deep acceptance of the inevitable in our lives.
Observing myself, I have always noticed, surprisingly, a clear sequence of these stages. However, working with clients, I have come to the conclusion that from person to person process can change its character and the stages can intermingle or repeat themselves. Sometimes we get stuck in one of the stages for a long time, and sometimes we skip over it when we barely touch it.
When we become aware of this step-by-step process of these five stages, leading us to accept the inevitable, then we become more aware of what we are living, and it speeds up our healing. And in the end, some sooner or some later, love and flowers of gratitude blossom in the soul.
I wish everyone to come to a deep healing and full acceptance.
Be in harmony with yourself and the world.
Maria Shakti
